Excellent! But please don’t overlook Count Robula. He’s one of NZ’s eight most important vampires (and not just because he was PM)
— Sofageddon (@sofageddon) September 19, 2018
Eight most important vampires. Let’s do this.
8. Sam Pyar
This is a children’s book about a kid who is probably a vampire? I have never read it but I know the author a tiny bit (hey Shalesh) and I was having trouble getting this list to eight. I think number 9 on this list is probably that girl with the piercings who was in that Vampire larp in your city in the 90s, you know the one. Anyway. Sam Pyar looks cool. Here’s the Amazon Kindle link.
7. Those randos in Wellington
Uh, this: vampire attack in Wellington
6. The vampires in Perfect Creature
Did you see this film? I didn’t see this film.
(NZ On Screen’s entry on Perfect Creature)
5. Grampire
Al Lewis: the most unusual typecasting in Hollywood history? “They only cast me as vampire grandfathers.” I never saw this film either. Al Lewis, though.
(NZ On Screen’s entry on Grampire)
4. Nailini Singh’s vampires
I have never read her books. If they were films I wouldn’t have seen them either based on the last couple entries in this list. Anyway she’s NZ’s biggest selling novelist and should be a bigger deal than she is. Would be ranked higher except her series about vampire killing angels is set in New York, not Taihape or wherever. (Here’s the info page for the first book in that series.)
3. Count Robula
New Zealand is a ridiculous country, and this is one of the high watermarks of ridiculousness, the nation’s recently-deposed Prime Minister Robert Muldoon moonlighting as a late-night horror movie host. I just found out he was still in parliament at the time. Under no circumstances take this country seriously. (Also, fuck that guy.)
(Stuff article by Alistair Hughes including some footage of Robula)
2. What We Do In The Shadows vampires
Known all over the world. One of the best vampire films ever made. Indelible comic creations. Pretty important Kiwi vampires, these ones. But still overshadowed by…
(NZ On Screen’s entry on What We Do In The Shadows)
1. Count Homogenised
IT IS I
COUNT HOMOGENISED
(NZ On Screen’s entry on his eponymous TV show)
—
NZ television used to put a horror movie on late on Sunday night: the Sunday Horrors. We’re bringing it back by picking a horror movie that’s available on youtube or somewhere else accessible, and watching it on Sunday evening. Join us!
Twitter: @horrorsunday
Facebook: Sunday Horrors group
Count Homogenised is legitimately terrifying.
Absolutely so. Utter nightmare fuel. What were they thinking!
Also my pitch for Count Homogenised Unredacted is almost ready.
One! One Bottle of milk! Ah ha ha!
Two! Two bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Three! Three bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Four! Four bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Five! Five bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Six! Six bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Seven! Seven bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Eight! Eight bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
I am so happy this is happening
Nine! Nine bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Ten! Ten bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Eleven! Eleven bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Twelve! Twelve lovely bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
One! One crate of milk bottles! Ah ha ha!
Uh oh
Thirteen! Thirteen bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Fourteen! Fourteen bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Fifteen! Fifteen bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Sixteen! Sixteen bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Seventeen! Seventeen bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Eighteen! Eighteen bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Nineteen! Nineteen bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Twenty! Twenty bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Twenty-one! Twenty-one bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
What are you going to do with all these bottles of milk, Count?
I am going to count them!
Twenty-two! Twenty-two bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Twenty-three! Twenty-three lovely bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Twenty-four! Twenty-four lovely bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Two! Two crates of milk bottles! Ah ha ha!
Twenty-five! Twenty-five bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Twenty-six! Twenty-six bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Twenty-seven! Twenty-seven bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Twenty-eight! Twenty-eight bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Twenty-nine! Twenty-nine bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Thirty! Thirty bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Thirty-one! Thirty-one bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Thirty-two! Thirty-two bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Thirty-three! Thirty-three bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Thirty-three and a third! Thirty-three and a third bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Thirty-three! Thirty-three bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
One! One quenched thirst! Ah ha ha!
Thirty-four! Thirty-four bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Thirty-five! Thirty-five bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Thirty-six! Thirty-six bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Three! Three crates of milk bottles! Ah ha ha!
Thirty-seven! Thirty-seven bottles of milk! Ah ha ha!
Never stop, Count