I’m actually going to be able to indulge myself in crappitude and watch the Oscars this time out. Hooray! This year I predict that the stupid academy will do this:
\nACTOR IN A LEADING ROLE<\/i>
\nJoaquin Phoenix – WALK THE LINE
\n(Because the academy won’t like ticking for Greasy Reesey without also ticking for her co-star. Philip Seymour Hoffman ain’t gonna get it because Truman Capote is too much of a freak.)
\nACTOR IN A SUPPORTING ROLE<\/i>
\nGeorge Clooney – SYRIANA
\n(The academy loves George, and they loved his Good Night and Good Luck, but they’re not gonna give him awards for that. So they can give him an award for this.)
\nACTRESS IN A LEADING ROLE<\/i>
\nGreasy Reesey Witherspoon – WALK THE LINE
\n(It has to be. Oh well. She’s a great actress in great movies, she just gives off the noxious vibe of bad-attitude Hollywood to me..)
\nACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE<\/i>
\nCatherine Keener – CAPOTE
\n(Every damn year this one’s hard. It traditionally goes to The New Girl, which Keener sort of is even though she’s past her twenties. I think the academy will want to reward Capote’s acting, even though Phil ain’t gonna get the boy trophy, so they can give it here. Plus there’s that whole ‘we like To Kill A Mockingbird and Gregory Peck’ thing which, quite frankly, will seriously influence votes. Stupid academy.)
\nANIMATED FEATURE FILM<\/i>
\nWALLACE & GROMIT AND THE CURSE OF THE WERE-RABBIT
\n(the academy sort of take the credit for this, because they gave Nick Park awards when he was just starting out in the Short Film category, so this one’s a shoo-in. Plus, Tim Burton’s goth sensibility is, like, SO 1990s, and Howl is that weird Japanese looking stuff.)
\nART DIRECTION<\/i>
\nGOOD NIGHT AND GOOD LUCK
\n(Kong is out because the academy’s sick of giving trophies to Weta, and the movie didn’t play so good. I think this will be a Clooney-love thing, actually. Plus: they smoke in this movie. That’s arty and daring now.)
\nCINEMATOGRAPHY<\/i>
\nBROKEBACK MOUNTAIN
\n(the prettiness of this movie is a good thing)
\nCOSTUME DESIGN<\/i>
\nWALK THE LINE
\n(just like last year, call it a hunch)
\nDIRECTING<\/i>
\nAng Lee – BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN
\n(because he never actually made Hulk, you hear? That wasn’t him!)
\nDOCUMENTARY FEATURE<\/i>
\nMURDERBALL
\n(tricky category this year, but I reckon this one’s the ticket. It’s awesome.)
\nDOCUMENTARY SHORT SUBJECT<\/i>
\nSHORT FILM (ANIMATED)<\/i>
\nSHORT FILM (LIVE ACTION)<\/i>
\nDon’t know any of the nominees. I hope they all win! Everyone should be a winner on the night.
\nFILM EDITING<\/i>
\nMUNICH
\n(I am going with my gut on this one. Munich was an Important movie, and Spielberg is still technically awesome. Worth a punt.)
\nFOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM<\/i>
\nJOYEUX NOEL
\n(It’s Christmas in the trenches! Awww. The historical story wins it outright, knockout blow, hee yah!)
\nMAKEUP<\/i>
\nSTAR WARS III: THE RETURN OF THE SITH
\n(because, you know, that thing, with the scary Hayden Christiansen and stuff. Whatever. It’s in a category with Narnia and Cinderella Man, I mean, geez. At least the academy *saw* Star Wars 3..)
\nMUSIC (SCORE)<\/i>
\nBROKEBACK MOUNTAIN
\n(it’s a movie about yearning, and if there<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I’m actually going to be able to indulge myself in crappitude and watch the Oscars this time out. Hooray! This year I predict that the stupid academy will do this: ACTOR IN A LEADING ROLE Joaquin Phoenix – WALK THE LINE (Because the academy won’t like ticking for Greasy Reesey without also ticking for her … Continue reading Oscars 2K6: Criswell Predicts<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-314","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p8D9ZE-54","jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/morgue.isprettyawesome.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/314","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/morgue.isprettyawesome.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/morgue.isprettyawesome.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/morgue.isprettyawesome.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/morgue.isprettyawesome.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=314"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/morgue.isprettyawesome.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/314\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/morgue.isprettyawesome.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=314"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/morgue.isprettyawesome.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=314"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/morgue.isprettyawesome.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=314"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}